So many days
throughout the year
I drink my cup of herbal cheer.
It warms the body
and calms the soul.
No fragrance, tint or taste is missed,
in Nature’s wonderous
Adapted from My Hawaiian Garden
by Hawaii Poet Don Blanding
Found this lovely poem on the box of some tea I purchased in Kauai the last time we visited there. The cup pictured above was give to me by my friend Tobi…an amazing author, poet, mountain bike rider, champion of women’s empowerment, and fellow “squiggle.” It’s my favorite bug to drink tea in. It’s what I am drinking tea in as I type this post. Somethings are just mean to be…this mug is mean to filled with tea at all times!
With this mother’s day come many sentiments..visually, at stores, on tv and all sort of social media. And I love it! It reminds me to the amazing mama you are and always will be. I hate the fact that you are so far away, but comforted that you are in my heart and head! I am still trying to figure and work on this thing called life. And so far I think I am doing ok. Being a mom…being a parent is one of the hardest things ever! And I am coming into understanding of some of the many things you must have went through. Even more, you came to a new country without any of your family to create one of your own. You are brave, courageous, true and full of spunk and and attitude and for that I am grateful. Sorry to not call more….one day I too will wonder why my girls don’t call more…but until then know this…..I love you and am so thankful for the life you and dad gave Raj and I. Happy Mother’s day Mom!
Today is the first day of Evolve…MINDBODY!
Took an awesome class at REV SLO! Spin & Gunz……I haven’t sweated like that in a long time! Last time was when I took a class from my friend Sue! I’m really amped about this and hoping it will make a lasting impression…it will! More ON REV SLO tomorrow…have to get some sleep as I have a 5am team training to go to before I work at 6am. Here we go…..!
I suppose this day was coming. My family and friends may read this and be very worried, but it’s considered pre-diabetes since I have yet to take the glucose test that will totally confirm it. Found out today as my OBGYN’s office called me to let me know of the results. I love Creating Harmony …they delivered both girls and have always been my goto for everything! They helped me get the required blood test I needed with a quick turn around for this program I am starting at my workplace, MINDBODY. And it couldn’t have come at a better time.
After I found out this afternoon, I went for a very long, much needed walk. I realize this is a wake up call for me. Even with all the exercising I have been trying to be consistent with (but let’s face it Rani, not as consistent as I should be) and with all the changing eating habits (which tends to falter when I return home from work at 3pm, famished cause I didn’t eat properly during the day)….I knew this day may arrive. Especially as I experienced a hard time with clothes as of late and not feeling very attractive or healthy for the past few months. I am awake now and I am scared. I should have been scared along time ago….
I know…I know..its just pre-diabetes..not even 100% sure yet. And yes, it could be worse….but for me, right now…this is worse. This is years of cultural and gene history catching up to me…and if don’t stop it now….I see medications and a world of hurt in the future. The buck needs to stop here.
Many changes have occurred over the past few month….schedules, jobs, income…I’m sure this is part of my mid-life crisis. But I have learned to push through as that is what needs to be done. The job I currently have is now a place I enjoy to go to…and all it took was time. Time and talking it out with family and friends. They are wonderful to me and for that I am ever grateful. When people talk about MINDBODY they always say, “I’ve heard they are a great company to work for!” They are 100% correct! I still will continue to pursue my first passion of massage therapy, but in order to do that, my health takes precedent.
And now I get to participate with 44 other people in a healthy challenge call Evolve Wellness! They are going to work with me for the next three months, giving my body, mind and soul a chance to be vigorous with lifestyle change. I still can’t believe it am part of this and again, I am grateful.
This new journey kicks off officially next week. And my goal is succeed for myself and my team. I’ll use my blog as a platform to record and discover. This is no longer only a challenge…it’s about life and living one that is full, healthy and happy. I am ready for this…I need this.
My mom told me awhile back, that she went to visit a wise man after a pilgrimage in India. She called me and said she talked to him about me. He said for me to do three things. And to keep a certain date in mind. I am doing those and see that date in my future and it’s all coming together. Without getting into the details of those three things, it’s mostly about positive ritual as a form of guidance for myself. And in true “Mom” form…there is a goal date for achievement!
So….I have placed it out here. I have typed the words from my head and heart. I have given voice to my body, mind and soul. It’s time Rani…it’s simply time.
Today is the first day of school….for both my babies. Isara is starting 2nd grade. Our youngest, Tamra, is starting kindergarten. We all walked to school this morning. After taking Isa to her new class and getting her settled in (which was no problem…she is so excited!), we headed over to the kinder area. There, we noticed the window blinds that normally look out to the play area were closed…that’s because that’s where all the parents were standing. They quickly lined all the kids up and basically whisked them away. For some reason I thought we would get to stay in the classroom, but this way is better…allows the kids to get to know their teachers and such. I didn’t cry…yet.
Trevis and I walked home, and suddenly realized how quiet it is. We then got a bit sad. He then played a song on YouTube…Remember When by Alan Jackson. He was outside, getting his truck ready for work, and I was inside filling out the endless forms for school. I still didn’t cry through the song.
After listening to it, I realized that song was more about a couple….us. I said that to Trevis. He had his glasses on, and I started crying and then realized that he was crying. He never cries. It was one of the most happiest days of my life…today….because my husband was releasing himself to me in a way that he had done only a few times before. I know, silly that I am so happy that my husband is crying…..but it brought us closer. We cried some more in each others arms in a strong bear hug hold, especially after we realized Tamra and Isara aren’t there to tell daddy…”Please stay daddy, please don’t go to work.” I think that really got to him. I love him. I like him.
He eventually had to go to work, and as he drove off, I walked in the home and I cried and cried.
But added to my crying was that I was missing my mom on her birthday. Happy Birthday Mama!!!!
I cried for my close friend, Jodi, who is fighting the fight for her life against cancer, a second time.
I cried for her family.
I cried for my girls and hoping they live a happy, safe and full life.
I cried for the chance I was given that allowed me to stay home with my girl this past year.
I cried at the fact that I almost gave all this up last year.
I am crying knowing, that my babies are growing everyday, and one day they will leave our nest.
Now what to do. After I am done typing this, what do I do. All those lists I have, all the things I want to get done…now is my chance right. Bittersweet.
Move on. Cause in a few hours, I will get to pick those lovely creatures up from school and hear all about their first day. And then we start again. And it gets easier….right?
Have you heard of Danielle LaPorte? Well you should! She is one my favorite authors and inspirationalist…is that even a word…it should be! Her words inspire me and transform thinking! She created this manifesto and it’s now part of my collection too! May it inspire you!
While looking in my shed…yes just looking..because working on it would be cleaning and organizing it…and I was just looking! So looking in my shed I came across many old papers and things…
This was one of them printed on parchment paper:
Rules for Being Human
1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it will be your for the duration.
2. You will learn lessons: you are enrolled in a full-time informal school called Life. Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons. You may like the lesson or think them irrelevant and stupid.
3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of tria-and-erro and experimentation. The “failed” experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiment that ultimately “works.”
4. A lesson is repeated until learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can then go on to the next lesson.
5. Learning lesson does not end. There is no part of life that does not contain its lessons. If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned.
6. “There” is no better than “here,” you will simply obtain another “there” that will again look better than “here.”
7. Others are simply mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.
8. What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you make of them is up to you. The choice is yours.
9. Your answers lie inside you. The answers to life’s questions lie inside you. All you have to do is look, listen, and trust.
10. You will forget all this.
Not sure where this came from. And some of it resonates for me at different times. But I like it…hope you do to! Funny what you can find when you’re really not looking for it!